Being a bisexual woman can be a double-edged sword

Anne is fed up with men, so she opts for pussy but discovers that it can be just as disappointing..

I had wondered for years if I would ever have the courage to tell someone that I am a bisexual woman.

“Hey, you,” said a woman who tapped me on the shoulder at the fruit and vegetable section.

When I turned around, my eyes almost popped out of their sockets. It was Sarah. Her and I were besties during varsity, but we went separate ways when she went to England after graduation.

We had kept in touch on Skype, but our schedules had always prevented us from seeing each other. I squeezed her and pressed my cheek against hers. Seven years had passed since we saw each other.

“When did you arrive?” I asked.

“Two weeks ago.”

I gaped. “Two weeks?”

“Ya. I wanted to surprise you, but I didn’t know that you had moved, so it took me forever to track down your mom.”

“Her and dad went away for their fortieth anniversary. Why didn’t you call me and ask where I was?”

“I knew that would’ve gotten you suspicious and ruined the surprise. Besides, I needed time with my family.”

“We’ve got so much to catch up on,” I said.

We had lunch at a cafe across the road and spoke for hours. I tried to avoid talking about my dating life, but it was inevitable that it would come up.

“We broke up three days ago. He slept with some floozy when he flew up to Johannesburg for a business trip. After being with him for 5 years, some skank came into his life for one night and ruined everything.”

I did not want to refer to Jonathan by name since hearing it made me want to vomit.

“I’m so sorry, Anne. Men are such jerks. Glad I kept my distance from them and didn’t get involved in a relationship. Disgusting pigs.”

I was so glad that Sarah and I were on the same page. After breaking up with Jonathan, I wanted to seek solace in a woman’s arms. Thinking about men had made me squeamish. I returned Sarah’s smile. She had no idea that I wanted to kiss her several times when we lay in our dorm bed. Her room was across the hall, and she slept in my bed whenever one of us felt lonely.

Look at her. She’s so beautiful. Wonder what it would be like to press my lips against hers. She’s got such soft skin. Ugh, how nice it would feel to have her touch me just for one night?

“Are you back for good?”

“No. Just visiting. I’ve got another two weeks.”

“Then, we need to make the most of it.”

We spent every day with each other. Cape Town was wonderful in summer, so we went shopping during the day and went out for dinner. Sarah and I gazed into each other’s eyes numerous times. I wondered if she ever thought about me in the way I did her. We held hands when we walked out of the restaurant to the car.

She hugged me when we got to my place and told me that she loved me. “I love you, too.” Sarah flashed her eyebrows and smiled when I looked at her lips.

She grunted. “Can’t wait to see you tomorrow,” said Sarah.

My energy plummeted. I felt like somebody had swept the carpet under my feet. I wanted Sarah to give me a sign that she wanted me to kiss her. Before going to bed, I googled ‘bisexual woman’ and hoped that useful information would help me to make a move. Most of the authors were men, so I did not bother reading the articles.

The closer Sarah’s departure approached, the more frustrated I became. Maybe, I should tell her. Who knows, she could’ve been waiting for me to make a move because she’s shy? What if that’s not the case? What if she freaks out and doesn’t wanna be my friend anymore.

The night before her flight, Sarah took me out for dinner. It was wonderful as always, but it got better when we saw that they were setting up a karaoke machine. The manager came to our table and asked us about the meals before answering our question about the karaoke.

“Should we?” Sarah asked me.

Wednesday was karaoke night when we were in varsity. We had not missed a single night for the four years we spent on campus and got the nicknames ‘Karaoke Queens.’

“Just like old times,” I said.

We were the first on stage and sang Ordinary World by Duran Duran. Sarah and I had our arms around each other during the song, and we swayed. Everyone at the restaurant applauded. We went to our booth and rubbed shoulders while gazing into each other’s eyes.

Sarah squeezed my hand. Now’s the perfect time. I leaned in.

“Everything okay,” interrupted the waiter.

“Yes, we’re fine. Thank you,” I said.

I could sense that Sarah became shy after the interruption. I knew that my chances with her would be better if we were alone.

“Let’s go check out photos at my place. There’s some I haven’t shown you.”

Our legs were rubbing against each other on the couch. I handed her a glass of wine and flipped the pages of an album that I had kept since our varsity days. She was amazed at how much time we had spent together and how close we had gotten. When Sarah’s glass emptied, I refilled it.

She laughed when she saw the picture of us at the pyjama party. Sarah put her hand on my leg and leaned into me when she laughed. It’s now or never. She’s going away tomorrow, and who knows when we’re going to see each other again?

“There’s something I have to tell you,” I said. “I’ve had several needs in my life that have been taken care of, but there’s one that hasn’t been. It’s something that I’ve kept hidden for my entire life, even from you. I’m a woman who likes men, but I’m also a bisexual woman.”

Sarah’s eyes bulged when she raised her eyebrows and compressed her lips. “And that’s not all,” I said. I lowered my gaze and took a deep breath. “I’ve had the hots for you since we were in varsity, and I always wondered what it would be like to kiss you.”

She gulped. “I’m just gonna go for it,” I said before leaning in and kissing her. Sarah kept her lips compressed, but she relaxed after I kept my lips pressed against hers and rubbed her breast.

Our tongues swirled in each other’s mouths. I pressed her shoulder so that she could recline on the sofa. I hovered over her and unbuttoned her shirt before slipping off her bra and kissing her breasts. Sarah raised her leg when I reached up her skirt.

I pulled down her underwear and touched her most intimate place. It felt incredible. I loved that she was warm and ready. Sarah moaned when I caressed her inside. I gently explored her sensitive spot while my fingers moved. She clutched a fist of my hair and cried out as the pleasure built.

Touching Sarah turned me mentally more than physically. Being with her allowed me to express what I had suppressed for more than 15 years. My shoulders relaxed, and my mind felt free for the first time. It was like the shackles had come off, and I was free to roam.

My left hand slid over her abdomen and squeezed her breast. Sarah grabbed my wrist and brought my finger to her lips. She pushed me onto my back and removed my underwear before tasting me. I arched my back and closed my eyes as she brought me to wave after wave of pleasure. My legs were open wide while she teased me.

Her head moved as she explored every part of me with her mouth. I gasped and trembled when I reached another peak, then released a long, shuddering breath. My leg quivered. Sarah smiled.

She rested her head on my chest. I stroked her back and kissed her scalp. We cuddled in the morning before taking a shower. After Sarah got dressed, she pulled out a hair comb from her purse. I was standing next to her and peeked inside.

“I see you got condoms,” I said.

“Ya. You never know when you might need them.”

I chuckled. “Good thing you won’t use them since you’re not having sex with men.” Sarah looked down. “You’re not sleeping with men, are you?”

“A couple of times in the U.K. and once when I got back.”

I gaped. “What about them being disgusting pigs? And you said that you had never gotten involved with them.”

“Not in a relationship, but every girl needs dick sometimes. Come on, Anne. Even you crave it once in a while.”

“So, you’ve been back for two weeks, and you already slept with some guy,” I said.

“He was a jerk but unbelievable in bed. I mean, really good. Blew my mind. The only turn off was him mentioning feeling regret before we did it because he had a girlfriend. He even said that we shouldn’t do it, but I was in the mood for dick.”

“Pity Jonathan didn’t feel regret before he cheated on me.”

“Your ex’s name was Jonathan?” asked Sarah.

“Yes.”

“This guy was also called Jonathan.”

I recalculated the timeline of his cheating and when Sarah had returned before showing her a picture of Jonathan.

“Oopsie,” she said.

“You bitch.”